I have been reading articles around how we should not be seeking balance in our lives. That in seeking it we are sending our minds crazy for we should accept the craziness that is life, all aspects of it and quit trying to find balance.
Yet this feels naïve to me. For the reality of our lives is that we do have plenty going on and to live with this chaos can and does send you out of control. Grasping for a metaphorical space to call your own. Constantly desiring to find peace. Is this really a way to live?
I think not.
For sure, we have to accept that life throws us many things to balance, yet is trying to ignore this the best way to go about it? I read recently, as a way to never need balance, is to not compartmentalise our lives but to see it all as a homogenous one. Can this work in a reality of making a living when you are not working from your computer/office at home? Can you really take your kids to your workplace? Would it be practical if you were a doctor, a corporate manager, an advertising exec? Would your kids really be happy hanging out at your workplace? What about their needs such as wanting to play with their friends without you yet need you as the taxi driver? The reality is we compartmentalise life as a way to focus and dedicate our time to our profession, our family, our friends, the home and looking after ourselves.
What then does a balanced life look like?
One where we objectively look at all we have going on. Maybe cry! Yes cry… for when we see how much we need to get done, the demands we have placed upon us, it can feel too much. Crying acts a release.
And once released we can focus on strategies, on creating a tool kit for seeing what needs to stay and what can go. Balance comes when we are not holding onto the stuff that we don’t want – be that mentally, physically and emotionally. Which creates more momentum in dealing with the stuff that is important to us.
When we know what has to stay in our lives, how do we deal with it? We can re-frame it so that we are excited about it all and bless ourselves that we have a life where we are able to have so much in it. Being thankful that we have the strength within ourselves to do it.
We can create pockets in the day of self-nurturing and care. A fleeting glance out the window, the few big deep breaths, the smile to yourself in the mirror, the hug from your partner or child.
Finding what brings you back into a place of centre, of feeling peaceful with yourself, maybe reading, singing, dancing, gardening, meditating, cooking, laughing and so on.
And in those other moments when you are working – by putting your full focus onto what you are doing, not wishing it to go faster, imagining you are elsewhere, wanting something different. As you put your full focus into it, you remove the faffing. It gets done, you can move on.
Balance is a beautiful way to see life, for even when we are pushing and getting to our edges, we need to maintain our balance so we don’t fall off!
If you would like to learn other techniques and how to apply them into your life then come join us on our ‘Balance Your Life’ retreat. We look forward to having you with us…
Find out more about Raw Horizons Wellbeing Retreats…
Author: Dr Claire Maguire of Raw Horizons Wellbeing Retreat